James Marchese, husband of former Real Housewives of New Jersey member Amber Marchese, has spoken to unCrazed about his controversial statements made on social media and his views on the LGBTQ+ community.
In his first statement on Twitter he said, “So true NO STRAIGHT MALE wants his son to be gay. A gay son is a curse that takes away your family traditions [and] heritage… LGTBIQ is a parents nightmare that destroys families.
Ruins holidays like Christmas; Kevin Hart we support you! Liberalism is a mental disorder,” — this was partially in response to Kevin Hart’s decision to step down from hosting the 2019 Academy Award Oscar’s event following comments Kevin made on Twitter in 2010.
unCrazed does not support the comments, actions or overall consensus that has been covered and in agreement to this interview, we are being impartial to provide a transparent platform that James can clear up his thoughts and comments. All questions are constructed from comments made from social media.
Joining the Skype call, James wore a blue U.S.A. branded jumper, or as he jokingly pointed out, hoodie.
James you have caused possibly one of the biggest discussions this week — one that has caused mostly negative feedback. You have been married since 2004 to Amber Marchese; and she has spoken out about the controversy.
How did she initially react to the statement you first made?
“First I want to clarify that I’ve had about 1.2 million people read the tweet, and over a million have positively commented to me. They generally do it very quietly, through DM’s, through other means because the left is so outrageous in their response they don’t want it necessarily attract that kind of attention.
What you really see is only about a thousand comments from around 300 people, so when you think about you are talking about 1.2 million people been touched and 300 crazy people making nasty comments; so it’s really the impression, it’s the Hollywood thing, everyone makes a big scream over it but the reality is most people believe traditional marriage and families is pretty normal and the way to go, over 99% of my feedback has been positive.”
That’s statistically speaking from your point of view?
“The nice thing I realise about social media is, I can track the number of people that have come to my site, what their opinions are, I can even tell you whether or not they have a Visa or Mastercard, whether they are Sprint or Verizon.
People don’t realise the level of data, I can take their median income, their assets, I know a lot; whether they are Republican or Democrat… it’s pretty impressive what we can do these days. Twitter and Facebook are actually a business, if you look on Wall Street you can see what they trade at — feedback is very easily measurable in my world. I can say 99.9% as a fact are in agreement.”
Speaking from a European point of view, for us, we are unable to typically do as much as that, such as seeing whether they have Visa or Mastercard — everything that could typically be deemed as invasive due to new the GDPR law isn’t available.
“Right, and that’s kind of crazy because the Liberals are driving this in the United States and across of course in Europe and if you look at who owns Twitter and who drives Google, who drives Facebook; they still know whether it’s male or female demographics, they obviously capture that data.
What they are doing is not allowing people to sell it and manipulate it because they’ve now figured out that the majority of the world does not agree with them, so in order to hide what’s really going on in the world and push a very Liberal agenda they’re hiding the fact that men and women are in fact different and there are only two genders, and that’s kind of driving a little bit wild at this point but it makes for a little bit of excitement on Twitter so I’m OK with that.”
Going back to my question about Amber, can you explain her initial reaction to your statement?
“Amber and I have a wonderful relationship, we have been married for a very long time; been through cancer twice, been through a lot together — TV obviously. We’re not always in agreement, we joke around… Amber is about 50% mom who’s a hippy, and 50% dad who’s a Conservative from Brooklyn.
It depends on where we are sitting which side I get and she wasn’t pleased at first but after we sat down and spoke about it she understands and respects my view point.
I’m not an irrational human being, I explain things very logically, and you know, she definitely has more of a mom instinct, she’s loving everybody and I’m a little bit more of the belief that your family or heritage has to be carried down or you don’t exist.
To cover the comment, you said, “So true NO STRAIGHT MALE wants his son to be gay. A gay son is a curse that takes away your family traditions [and] heritage… LGTBIQ is a parents nightmare that destroys families. Ruins holidays like Christmas… Kevin Hart we support you! Liberalism is a mental disorder.” — this was in response to Kevin Hart’s decision to step down from hosting the Oscars.
Do you feel Kevin apologised sincerely, or because of social and society pressure?
“I do not know Kevin Hart, I’ve never spoken to the man. I’ve got great respect for any self-made man in this world. I don’t presume to know why he did what he did.
What I can tell you is that as a male in a primarily Liberal, gay driven industry such as TV, movies… you are not allowed to express your views; and if you do express your views, even if they are just honest and sincere, or I think in Kevin Hart’s case just kind of joking around as a comedian, he’s use to being a bit of a wisea**, you get shutdown. I take big issue to that. You should be able to be a little crazy, you should be able to express how you feel and if people don’t agree, that’s OK.
As long as we all understand that you have the right to express it, you have the right to joke around about it, you can move on. That’s how it should be. I don’t know personally what his feelings are but I respect the man and I am saddened by the fact he had to pull away from a dream; I believe Dwayne Johnson said that it was Kevin Hart’s dream to host the Oscar’s and to me some very cruel people who support people like Harvey Weinstein, Bill Clinton, who support Kevin Spacey who allegedly has had relations with small children, those people are promoted, but a self-made black man, who is really funny by the way, he’s a really funny guy, is tortured because he made an off colour joke… some of the things I hear out of Chelsea Handlers mouth is so horrific and yet she’s celebrated.
To me, it’s good old fashioned elite Hollywood pushing down people with other views, and pushing down on black men and it’s disgusting to me and it’s the opposite of what it should be.”
You believe in free speech, as do the majority of modern society — why do you feel it’s important people have different views without being silenced?
“That to me is a very intrinsic question to who we are as human beings. When you think about the idea of free speech, it’s a free idea. As long as your idea isn’t ‘yell fire’ at a movie theatre that harms people physically, you should be allowed to express it.
Think about several hundred years ago when my family came to this country, we were black; that’s what we were considered, and we had different ideas and different approaches, and so did many other immigrants coming to this country.
If they were shutdown we would still have slavery, women wouldn’t be able to vote. You go down the list of things that would not be happening which are very positive to this world; it all started with free speech, an idea, someone standing on a platform saying ‘this is what I believe’.
America is fundamentally based on the idea that someone got up and said, ‘I believe I should have some representation, and you should’t be taxed unless you have representation,’ and it’s disgusting to me that this world has become so anti-free speech. People should be able to say whatever they want, they can’t whatever they want, but they should be able to say whatever they want, because that’s what makes us individuals.”
What has motivated you to speak out about this?
“What’s motivated me to speak about this one is a very personal issue. We’ve recently had a school, Christian Brother Academy, which is a Christian based school in Lincroft, New Jersey, and they are embracing a very Liberal, gay, culture.
They’re pushing LGBT issues on freshman coming in, they’re allowing seniors, who are gay, to indoctrinate freshman without their parents knowing. They are part of a Catholic faith that now has cardinals being indicted for pedophilia. I am watching Disney World, 35 men indicted for pedophilia.
This gay culture is starting to seep in where little kids, 10 years old are being forced to take hormones; children should not be involved in this conversation.
If you look statistically, 47% of 18 to 24 year olds now believe they are now gay, or at least bisexual, but really only 2% (and these are NIH CDC statistics in the United States) believe they are actually homosexual. It becomes a lifestyle choice, it becomes a popular decision.
The problem is, a popular decision is OK when you are 35 years old and you know who you are, when you are 14 or your 16 or your 18 or your 10, issues of defining who you are should really be more about what kind of career you want, where you want to study, who you want to be as a human being… teach them kindness, morality, little kids shouldn’t be forced to face issues with sex and they shouldn’t be in indoctrinated by sick people in the school system, like CBA or like the Catholic faith pushing it on young men — or Disney World where your kids go to play, there should be zero tolerance with these things.
This isn’t a free speech issue, it’s an assault issue, it’s an indoctrination issue. I’m one to believe in people’s rights or religion, I have grown up Catholic, I have friends who are Muslim, friends who are Jewish, I have friends who study the Hindu faith; what I can tell you is universally we all have one central theme, we want to have children and we want our children to have children, and that’s a very traditional view point. Reality is, it’s now hit home where I’ve watched kids have gay pornography sent to them at 14 years old and the Christian school turn the other way.”
In hindsight, do you think you have crossed a line, and can you understand why it comes across as homophobic?
“I know that the Liberals want to paint me as homophobic, but just to be clear homophobia means you have an aversion or dislike, are prejudice against gay people.
One, I don’t dislike gay people, I have a lot of gay friends actually. I worked in an industry for three/four years that is predominantly gay. I have a lot of friends like that who have a lifestyle, who are even married legally in New Jersey. I’ve helped them with finance issues, I don’t have an aversion to anybodies lifestyle.
It’s not homophobic, I don’t have a personal prejudice against anyone. I meet people and take them for who they are, what I do have an issue with is when you have groups pushing children to do something they shouldn’t do. No, I didn’t step over the line, no I’m not homophobic, that’s not even close.
My personal experiences led me to my conclusion. My wife, Amber Marchese, said it very eloquently, she said of all the people we have met, and we probably have met 2 or 300 hundred homosexual couples, the one theme is, their life is a burden, it’s not a happy life. I don’t know what parent would want their children to not have a happy life, and that is where my wife gives me a lot of balance. She’s a little bit ‘softer’ approach than I am.”
Do you consider yourself a bigot?
“I take personal pleasure when people call me a bigot as they are saying they’re intolerance of my opinions. Bigotry by definition is an intolerance of someones opinion; again, if one of my friends wants to be gay, I think that’s wonderful, I have no issue with it.
I’m completely tolerant of my friends who are Muslim, my friends who are gay, my friend who are Jewish. I think their lives are their lives, and they should live it and enjoy it. I don’t have an opinion that they can’t do what they want do it, if you read my tweets, if you read what I am saying, I’m saying what I want for my family, for my children, for my generations.
When they come out and tell me that I’m a monster, they are bigots; they are intolerant to the fact that I want children. What’s really interesting is, a lot of these people can’t get their arms around the idea, or can’t get their thoughts around the idea that if you have gay couples, no matter how you cut it, one of the two isn’t biologically being carried along. One of the two is done.
If you take a family tree (Amber and I were talking about this), the families that had people in Auschwitz and Jewish families, half of their tree is wiped out because a certain group were in a concentration camp. If you look at what’s going on in families today, if two and three kids become gay, you are literally going to wipe out half of family trees, you are going to take away lineage… and that’s a problem to me.”
You said that those who are gay are depressed and suicidal and some comments, made by those responding to you, say that it’s people such as yourself who cause those that are openly gay to feel suppressed, depressed and even suicidal. Do you feel responsible for that?
“Absolutely not. If you look at the statistics on addiction, drug use, suicide and depression in the LGBT community, it has been going on forever. In my opinion it’s simply driven by this; biologically, we are all organic organisms, which are driven to recreate life.
When you try to go against your basic programming, of course it’s going to cause depression, of course it’s going to cause isolation. It’s not my tweet that causes you to be depressed, it’s not my opinion that causes you to have a drug addiction. Addiction has been an issue since the beginning of time with man, whether it’s alcohol, heroin, opioids now I believe fentanyl, this is no different.
When you don’t follow your biological programming which is to create life, to have someone else of the opposite sex be part of your life, you are causing a diss-ease in your basic programming. Therefore, you are going to have significant issues. That’s not my opinion, that is how it has been characterised for thousands of years, even in medical journals if you look it up.
We all have different demons that we chase in life, we all have different addictions. Reality is, you make a choice whether you want to be with someone of the opposite sex, you make a choice whether you want to have children and you make a choice whether or not you want to take drugs. We can call that a disease, but the reality is, you put a needle in your arm and that’s what caused it.”
What’s your message to people that work tirelessly everyday to promote the LGTBQ+ community?
“My message for them would be simply don’t push your lifestyle on other people. Don’t take a position that someone else who wants a traditional family is a monster or a demon, and if you want to help people who are suffering because they’ve made a lifestyle choice to be gay or lesbian, then they should help them. That’s a kind act.
There’s a difference between helping people and forcing 10 year olds to take hormones. There’s a difference between helping someone who has already made a decision and has led themselves down a road that’s destructive, to make sure that person has equal rights versus forcing a 14 years old to watch gay pornography at his Christian high school.
That’s a significant issue in my role and right now what I see is the LGBT community, they actually have more rights than you and I do, no one protects me in my job, no one protects what I say or do. They have more protections, they’re not asking for equal, they’re asking for more.
I’m sorry, if you are gay, it’s a lifestyle. The act of having sex with another man or being attracted to another man in a physical way is a choice. You may not like it, but I have looked at every genetic study, if you look, less than 2.5% of the European and United States cultures are gay, but 47% experiment with it.
What does that tell you? That 98% of the people in the world try it, but they don’t end up being that. Why? Because it’s a choice. Just like, in this modern day I would say probably 30 to 40% of kids experiment with drugs. But how many become addicts? It’s a very similar study if you look at how it works and if you look at the population.
I would ask you to consider that. It’s really more of a popularity thing, and if you look at twins and some of the studies that are being done on twins right now, it really shows that they have the same genetic code, one is gay, one is not. Why is that? Well, it’s lifestyle, it’s popularity.
I don’t know if that makes sense; I could get into the actual studies. You can go to the Washington Post, last year said that one third of kids between 18 and 24 believe they are gay. Something was out in the UK a year ago, the NIH studies are from 2014. These aren’t my statistics, they are globally accepted statistics from the governmental agency so I’m just putting forth that even if someone is gay half their life, they can end up becoming straight. I know people who are straight up until 40 years old then become gay. Half your life is straight, half your life is gay, how is that not a choice?
It saddens me for people to force something on other people. Let them all live their own life and figure it out.”
Many want an apology from you; do you have, or are you going to make an apology?
“I will apologise if they’ve made bad decisions in life that have caused them to be so embarrassed and ashamed of who they are, that they feel the need to shutdown my free speech.
I will apologise to those in the world who are not able to speak like I am, freely and express that they want grandchildren. My apology is not for what I said, it’s that I didn’t say it sooner, that I didn’t come out harder, that I didn’t challenge the status quo when I was on shows like Housewives of New Jersey, who manipulate women to make them look crazy. So my apology is not for saying it, my apology is not fighting harder for those families.”
Do you have anything else you want to add?
“The only thing I would like to finish with is my wife and I have been through a lot. She’s a kind woman, she’s never hurt anybody. If someone has issue with what I’ve said, come to me, I have no problem engaging, I’ll respond to them; I try to treat everyone respectfully as long as they are treating me that way, but people who profess to be pro-gay or tolerant, going to my wife’s page saying ‘die of cancer’, they should really look in the mirror because that’s a sickness, that’s a disease, when you want to hurt an innocent person.
They are prejudging Amber, they are prejudging my wife for something I said. They don’t know who she is, they’ve never met her before, it’s really disgusting and to me it speaks about the LGBT community. They are hateful and angry people because they can’t just say, ‘hey, if my parents were both gay, I wouldn’t exist’ — they don’t get the concept that it’s OK that I want to have grandchildren and it’s OK that I don’t want my sons to be gay, and I don’t want my daughter to be gay.
That’s the last though, they should be a little bit kinder to people, especially ones that aren’t even involved in the conversation.”
What are your thoughts on the conversation that has sparked huge debate?